With all the excitement involved in planning a wedding, there are also some difficult decisions to make. And not all of them will be easy. After you’ve officially announced your engagement and picked the wedding date, the guest list can steadily grow without much effort at all, but it should be concrete before booking services or purchasing goods from certain vendors.

So what’s the best way to trim the guest list? An article featured on Brides.com gives helpful advice to couples looking to find middle ground in what can add tension between the couple and the in-laws. The reality is the budget doesn’t always match the wish list, and that’s when engaged couples have to think twice about the lengthy guest list.

First, figure out the general size of the wedding and ideal venue. Are you dreaming of an intimate affair or a large party? To reduce confusion, clarify the extent of your family’s involvement in the guest-list process early on. While each family typically invites half the guests, that formula might change due to financial obligations or when the size of each family isn’t comparable.

Consider whether you will invite children, set an age limit or only allow close relatives to bring their children; this stipulation can be said politely on the wedding invitations. Another option is to hire a babysitter or two to watch the children during the ceremony and possibly after.

Sometimes, sending a wedding announcement in lieu of an invitation to out-of-state guests is sufficient, so don’t feel obliged to send wedding invitations to everyone you know. Set clear limits when cutting down the guest list, without exceptions: For example, no second cousins, no coworkers, no dates or no long lost friends. After finishing the grueling process, keep track of your guest list on the computer or with an at-home filing system. Then, you can move onto your next step in the wedding planning process! If you want a creative way to announce your engagement or to surprise friends and family, check out the “Just Engaged” apparel and wedding accessories at Advantage Bridal!